


Always

by mysteriousmagicx



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 13:54:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysteriousmagicx/pseuds/mysteriousmagicx
Summary: Levi and his daughter go to visit his wife. It brings back some painful memories to say the least.
Relationships: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/You, Levi Ackerman & Reader, Levi Ackerman/Reader, Levi Ackerman/You
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	Always

“Papa, get up!” A childish voice commands.

Levi attempts to ignore the child, pretending to sleep. Maybe if he looks asleep, she’ll give up.

“Papa!” She nudges his shoulder.

He turns the other way, burrowing his face into the pillow.

“Papa, Papa, Papa!”

Who was he kidding, she was just like her mother. Annoying and energetic.

“For fuck’s sake let me sleep brat.” Levi grumbles, putting a pillow over his head.

“But Papa, you never sleep. I know you’re awake.”

Sharp kid. She’s a lot smarter and observant than others.

With a sigh he flops onto his back, revealing his ashen hues. His daughter leans over him, a small smile on her face. She crawls onto his body, sitting on top of his chest.

“Now tell me why the hell you decided to screech like an annoying bird at me today.” He comments dryly. Grey eyes much like his shines vibrantly.

“We have to see Mama today, remember?”

His eyes soften, his heart clenching. His stoic mask is on, but Chloe still narrows her eyes at him.

“Is something wrong?”

“No brat, nothing is wrong.”

She pouts. “Papa you can’t hide things from me.”

Sometimes her being a little too observant kills him. “Have you seen yourself in the mirror? Your hair is damn crow’s nest.”

Her hands fly to her head, her cheeks turning red. “N-No it’s not!” She denied.

He rolls his eyes at her. “Do I look blind to you?”

Averting her gaze from him, she chews her lips. “Do you…do you not want to see Mama?”

His breath hitches. It takes a second for him to recollect himself before answering. “Of course I want to see her. Go fix your hair and get dressed.”

Chloe’s eyes snap back to him, a beaming smile on her face. “Okay!” Scrambling off him, she quickly runs into her room, the slaps of her feet against the wood fading away.

Staring up at the ceiling he exhales deeply. Mustering the willpower, he gets up and walks to the bathroom to freshen up. Afterwards, he looks through his closet for his normal civilian clothes. His eyes catch his old military uniform in the very back. He can still see the crimson on his green cape. Tearing his gaze away, he takes out his black jacket, white shirt, and his black pants.

It’s been years since he wore that uniform.

As his fingers tuck in the cravat, he looks out the window. The sun’s rays bath the city in a warm glow. The trees are gently swaying in the wind. Not a single cloud dots the sky. It’s always calm and peaceful on this day every year.

Seeing himself in the mirror one last time, he wonders what Chloe is doing. By now she would be saying that she’s ready. He was about to call out to her when a small voice interrupted him.

“Papa?”

Turning around, he sees his little girl in the doorway. Her raven hair is down, going to the middle of her back. She’s wearing a simple white and blue polka dot dress reaching to her knees. He notices that she’s avoiding his gaze, her hands behind her back.

“What is it?”

“U-Um, I was wondering if you could put this on for me?”

He stares at the object in her hands when she brings them out in front of her. A cherry blossom hair pin. The gems gleam in the sunlight.

“Papa?”

He snaps out of his train of thoughts, clearing his throat. “Come here.”

Obliging, she stands in front of him and gives him the hairpin. The gems feel cool and smooth as he runs his thumb over them. He admires the object for a little longer, knowing full well that his daughter is watching him intently. Crouching down, he sweeps some of her hair to the side, sliding the hairpin on.

“There.”

“Thank you Papa!” She gives him a hug. He was caught off guard, but reciprocates the embrace. For a while they just hug each other, content to be in each other’s presence.

“Alright let’s go.” He’s the first to pull away, standing up. Chloe slips her little hand in his as they walk out of their home.

It’s still relatively early, which was good in his opinion since he didn’t want to hear all the chatter and laughter. The air smells fresh and clean, the sun shining down at the pair. He still feels cold.

Chloe has a bounce in her step, swinging their hands back and forth. She takes note of every little detail, her curious eyes eager to see new things. It was hard to pry her from her books late at night.

They come across a dirt path, leaving behind the buildings and houses. As they continue to walk, more and more flowers were seen in many different colors. Sun kissed yellow, emerald green, amethyst purple, the list goes on. Chloe gasps in surprise at the new flowers she sees, tugging on his hand and pointing at them. He merely nods before looking straight ahead. A tree is coming up. Walking under the tree, they stop.

“Hi Mama!”

A breeze goes by, the rustling of the branches filling the air. The former Captain looks solemnly down at the headstone.

(Y/N) Ackerman

A great soldier and a loving wife

“Hey (y/n).”

They sit down on the ground, Chloe in between his legs. She talks animatedly, talking about everything and anything as if her mother was right in front of her. He keeps himself distracted by weaving his fingers through her hair.

Time passed. The blue sky shifted to a blend of various colors. Reds, oranges, yellows, and pinks streak across the sky. The air grew colder, the sun sinking into the horizon. Chloe fell asleep on his lap, his black coat over her form.

“It’s not easy you know.” He finds his voice. His eyes look down at his sleeping daughter. “She has my features…but she’s exactly like you. Sometimes it hurts to look at her because all I see is you.”

_“Levi! Levi, Levi, Levi!”_

_“Shut up.” He grumbles, pulling the covers over his head._

_“It’s a nice day outside! Come, look.” He feels her weight on top of him._

_“Don’t care, Let me sleep woman.”_

_“Hmmmm, no.” (Y/N) says cheekily, ripping the covers off his head._

_He scowls at her, but he knew he couldn’t stay mad at her for long. It looked like she just woken up herself with her crazy ass bed hair that resembled a bird’s nest. She smiles at him, her eyes bright as she kisses his cheek. His heart swells with love at her affection, but his face remains passive._

_“Good morning.”_

_He huffs. “I hardly call it that since you woke me up yelling like an idiot.”_

_She throws her head back and laughs, her voice soothing to his tormented mind. Leaning forward, (y/n) brushes her nose against his._

_“Love you.”_

His throat constricts, a pang shooting through his heart. He swallows the lump in his throat to continue.

“She wore the hairpin today. I think she was just scared to wear it before since she knew it was yours.”

_“Oi, come here.” Levi beckons at (y/n) with his finger._

_She shows him a quizzical look but nonetheless places herself on his lap. He leans back in his chair, struggling to find the right words to say. She notices immediately, she always does. Laying a hand on his cheek, she speaks._

_“What is it? Something wrong?”_

_He sighs, shaking his head. Sometimes he curses his tongue for being unable to voice words affection as easily as insults. Reaching into a drawer he takes out a small package with a ribbon, thrusting it at her._

_“For me?” (Y/N) says in surprise._

_“Who else?”_

_She lets out a laugh. Carefully unraveling the ribbon, she takes the lid off. She gasps, her eyes wide as she stares at the object in the box._

_“Oh my god…it’s beautiful…,” She says in amazement. (Y/N) takes the hairpin out, her eyes mesmerized._

_“Thank you Levi…,”_

_He turns his head to the side, unsure of how to act. Gentle hands cradle his face, turning his head back to look at her. She gives him a tender kiss, full of love and adoration. His arms tighten around her waist, hoping to convey just as much love to her._

_“Can you put it on for me?” She says after they part._

_He couldn’t say no to her. Taking the hairpin from her, he sweeps her hair off to the side and clips it on. Getting off him, she runs into their room._

_“Oh it looks so pretty!” She squeals in delight._

_Going to their room as well, he sees her admiring herself in the mirror. A miniscule smile graces his lips at her, happy that he was able to make her happy._

He hangs his head, his hair curtaining his expression. His heart is heavy, full of sorrow. A droplet slides down his cheek. “That day still hurts me.” He whispers hoarsely.

_“(Y/N), stay with me!” Levi yells out, grasping her hand. God there’s so much blood. On her, on the white sheets, the floor._

_Her skin is growing colder by the second. She’s breathing heavily, her eyes fluttering close._

_“(Y/N)!” His voice cracks._

_Her eyes open again. She looks up at him and smiles. How the hell is she smiling at a time like this!?_

_“Levi…,” she says weakly. She shakily lifts her free hand to cup his cheek._

_“Don’t leave me. Please, I can’t lose you.” He’s breaking, his normally stoic facade gone. Tears slip from his eyes. His eyes, full of fright and pain._

_“It’s okay, you’ll be okay.” She murmurs soothingly, running her fingers over his cheekbone._

_How the hell is he going to be fine without her? Who’s going to wake him up in the morning with a kiss? Who’s going to snuggle up to him on rainy days? How’s going to hold him after a nightmare, after his grief becomes too much to bear?_

_How the hell is he going to survive?_

_“Please don’t.” He whispers again._

_“My Levi…,” she says slowly, her time slipping away. Her fingers curl behind his nape and brings him down for a kiss. He kisses her hard, tears mixing in with her taste. He aches for her love, savoring her one last time before she leaves him forever._

_“I won’t be completely gone, remember that.” (y/n) says as she strokes his jaw. “I love you Levi, I’m always by your side. You can do it.”_

_Before he could even say anything back, her hand falls limply beside her. His eyes widen, a strangled sob escaping him._

_“(Y/N)! (Y/N) answer me dammit! (Y/N)!”_

_She doesn’t respond. She was really gone. The love of his life was dead. His shoulders shake, his face buried in her neck._

_“Sir?”_

_He looks up at the nurse. She’s holding a pink bundle in her arms. “Your daughter….,” the nurse trails off, surprised to see the tears on the feared Captain’s face._

_Shakily reaching his arms out, the nurse gently places his baby in his arms. She immediately leaves, the door closing behind her with a click. Levi looks down at their baby who was sleeping. Tufts of raven hair were on the top of her head. She was so small. Dragging one finger down her cheek, he marvels on how soft her skin was._

_Cradling the baby close to his chest, he closes his eyes._

“Papa! You’re crying!”

He breaks out of his trance to see Chloe wiping the pads of her thumbs across his face. She has a worried look on her face, just like (y/n).

“Don’t cry Papa, Mama wouldn’t like it.”

He realizes that it’s nighttime now. Stars twinkle like gemstones in the dark abyss above. The moon shines down on the city with an ethereal glow.

“Are you okay Papa?” Chloe asks.

“I am now.” He says softly, bringing his daughter closer to him.

“Are you cold? Do you want your coat back?”

“No, keep it on. I don’t want to deal with you being sick.”

“Papa, the stars look so pretty.” Chloe reaches her hand out, as if she’s touching them. “Do you think Mama is watching us?”

As he looks up at the sky, he says,“She always is.”

_Thank you for never leaving my side._


End file.
